EQ > IQ: Self-Aware Leaders Deliver Better Results
It’s well known today that people with higher emotional intelligence (EQ) are likely to be more successful, more productive, more creative, more positive, more focused on solutions rather than on problems, better leaders, healthier in body, mind and spirit; more content in work and at home. Higher EQ people are generally your high performers. We know this by experience (observe your best leaders in meetings and when managing conflict) and by 30 years of supporting research. EQ has a positive relationship with these outcomes: success, productive, creative, solutions-focus, effective leadership, wellness, satisfaction, and results oriented.
One would then ask how do I increase my EQ? How do I start developing and cultivating my own emotional intelligence? How do I bring EQ competencies to my organization? There are lots of approaches that we can take to become aware and increase EQ. Any of the guru books will help you address EQ in a way you would approach your IQ efforts. Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, Cary Cherniss, S. Stein & H. Book, or Ravi Rao…. LOTS of great books out there supporting your desire to enhance the EQ of one person, one team, one organization, one family. And like all developmental efforts, it takes practice!
Recognize that high EQ starts with self-awareness – the foundational competency within EQ models. In other words, focusing on self-awareness, emotional self-awareness, managing emotions, managing with emotions, and clarity on how your actions/words impact others are building blocks for EQ competencies.
Below are a few initial steps to become self-aware. Some are easy starts; others are longer processes.
Visit eiconsortium.org – Consortium for Research on Emotional Intelligence in Organizations. Find articles and studies that support the power of this leadership competency.
Google emotion/feeling words. Print a chart and begin discussing emotions/feelings within the conversation. For example: Are you worried or angry? Or…. it sounds like you are really battling lots of mixed emotions here. Too often we focus on the words, but a discussion around the emotions behind the words builds deeper discussions and provides clarity to those in the conversation.
List your strengths. Write out your core values. Identify your passions/joys. Spend more time on these high energy areas.
Ask 2 or 3 people who you trust fully to provide feedback on ONE area you are focusing. Reach out to these 2 or 3 people, who will be brutally honest but always want you to succeed, and let them know you are working on one thing (e.g listening more deeply, or presentation skills, or meeting facilitation……) and follow up with them on a regular basis to get their feedback. Understanding how others view you in areas you are developing/improving is a good way to ensure you are being seen as you want to be seen.
Read research-based books (author names provided above) on the topic of EQ.
These steps are ways to become more self-aware – they will support you focusing on better understanding yourself and understanding how you are perceived by others. Knowing your own internal drivers, and understanding how others see you are both required for self-awareness. And, self-awareness is the basis for improved emotional intelligence.
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